Sunday, 2 November 2014

Mute Of Choice

Fills my small words
And drops in the well of voices.
Yet i know
I can raise my voice
Louder than any power
And break my silence.
Shatter it
Like glass under foot.
But my lips remain firm,
Barbed wire stretching the gap.
I am the secret keeper
Who tells none of her own.
I choose this,
In the shadows.
A mute of choice.
For when i speak
People listen.

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Wednesday, 29 October 2014

In The Middle Of The Lake

This is a perfect dream.
Staring at you in the summer haze,
In an old, warn rowing boat,
In the middle of the Lake.

The lapping ripples on the hull,
Dragonflies dancing on the water.
it's so peaceful out here,
Just you and me
In the middle of the lake.

I remember all the years i spent
Avoiding boys like you.
Handsome, popular and egoistic.
I never imagined i'd be with you
In the middle of the lake.

You proved me wrong,
Yes your handsome and popular
But caring and good hearted.
I'm so glad you took me
To the middle of the lake.

I look into those hazel eyes
And smile back at you.
My heart is melting,
I'm falling in love
In the middle of the lake.

But now i'm trying to remember
That disturbing thought i had.
But it quickly slips away
In the middle of the lake.

I look back into your eyes
and see the chilling truth.
There are ghosts swimming in your eyes
In the middle of the lake.

My heart beats faster,
My mouth is dry.
I don't feel love anymore.
I'm afraid!
I'm in the middle of the lake.

Your smile seems to twist,
My heart falters.
A terrible thought crosses my mind.
Now i know why you took me
To the middle of the lake.

The waters cold.
The sunlight fades.
My final resting place
Is in the middle of the lake. 

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Saturday, 25 October 2014

O Cunning Enemy

I can feel his eyes caressing my face with a loving stare. I keep my eyes down on the printed words in my hand, careful not to move a muscle in my face. Thats what en's looking for, a momentary lapse, a crack in my carefully moulded mask that will drop a hint of an emotion. But i'm well trained, my face gives nothing away but still i am afraid, it seems the more i resist outward emotion the closer he seems to get. I sneak a glance, i'm right. He is staring intently at me, eyes searching with that knowing smile of new understanding. anger bubbles up inside me, why can't he be driven away like every other. Give up and leave me in my sanctuary. But no, he's different, dangerous. he won't give up.

I hate his stubbornness, his patience. Slowly eroding away the concrete walls of my emotions. His voice enticing me to disclose my thoughts to him. He does not know the dangerous path he is trying to lead me down. Stitches can only hold so many pieces of a heart together, mine is surely bend repair. I can feel the tape peeling and the treads straining even now. One slip, that's all it takes to unravel a tapestry, smash a vase.

I take a breath in and muster another glance, this time he looks straight into my eyes. I'm caught like a rabbit in the headlights. My emotions roar and naked for him to see. He's to close, far to close, i try to pull away but his gaze holds me captive. This was his plan, entice me to look and catch me off guard. So strategic, plotting, scheming.he's trying to break me, leave me with the splinters of my porcelain heart scattered across the floor.